Did everyone enjoy their turkey day farts as much as I did..?
I hope so!!
Recently I was minding my own business in faithful pursuit of fulfilling the cycling gods every desire to their fullest extent when suddenly, the heavens split wide and as the sun broke through, awash in its glow, I heard a faint whisper..
"We're sending you on a mission to dissuade all suspicion of the custom cycling industry's moronic decisions and as our instrument, you'll aid in restoring the old traditions.."
I was given a mission..
This mission...was to take place in LA..
If you're wondering wtf I'm talking about and require further clarification, I'm talking about a bunch of FUCKING COWARDS that pose as health and environmentally 'conscious' MORONS gleefully succumbing to useful idiot status by literally PUSHING DEATH at the behest of their big pharma sponsored media daddies all so they could continue to drape themselves in a veil of good-person-hood instead of actually being a good person. You know, like the type of person that was willing to speak out against the narrative despite knowing all too well how much hate he would receive LIKE BEING CALLED A CRAZY CONSPIRACY THEORIST FOR POINTING OUT THE MEDIAS LIES DESPITE HAVING SPENT 30 YEARS WORKING INSIDE OVER A DOZEN DIFFERENT NYC MEDIA OFFICES AND BEING CONSTANTLY LIED TO BY PEOPLE THAT PAY ME TO BE HONEST but hey its def me who's the bad guy duuuuuhhhhh. Which should be obvious to anyone with half a brain at this point but as we all got to see for ourselves, more than half the people out there are running around with less than a quarter. Granted I'm right by NYC which is chock full of retards ASK ME HOW I KNOW. I look at one every morning, lol, not because I am but because I'm not, yet put up with so much insane bullshit I must be, lol- good times! I go more in depth on this subject in Chapter 1 of the grail series but I'm essentially alluding to all the no talent narcissists taking selfies wearing face diapers and posting black square propaganda that somehow turned into an even DUMBER version of the politically correct cultists from the film PCU:
Keep in mind that flick came out the year I graduated High School in 1994. I've had to put up with god knows how much unconscionably blatantly obvious excremental gobbly goop propagandist NONSENSE for DECADES. But you know what they say- the more things change the more they stay the same. Well that's because the devil can't create which is why he only mocks what he can't defeat and where the useful idiots come in handy. But nevermind all that because at no point in history has anyone ever wrapped a nefarious plot inside a 'virtuous' cause..
In any case, to aid in the forging of a new empire, the cycling gods in their infinite wisdom, sent me an anvil..
A Type 3.1 Journeyman Frame jig from Anvil to be exact!
MISSION AXZEPTED!!!
The big thing with buying these rare gems used is you want to find a hobbyist 'used' one and not one with like a thousand frames on it. If you're just fucking around like I do on occasion you're going to have a easier time getting what you paid out of a clean one when the day comes to pass it along..
I flew over this shit:
I witnessed a coyote out for a casual stroll:
I went to Hollywood!
I saw a USELESS BUNDLE OF STICKS:
I stayed at this cool old school vintage hunting lodge with a view:
Which turned out to be so ramshackle and in DIRE need of a mans touch I dubbed it the 'Lesbian Palace' because WAY more attention was put into the placement of the dozen sowing machines and fake vines all over the goddamn place than the crumbling walkways, half screwed on handles and not to mention the fucking ants crawling all over the place:
Fucking gross. Can't tell you how difficult it was for me to not add shit to my home depot list. Like I was borderline offended that I had to ENDURE just leaving everything broken..
Here's the main issue with the lesbian palace- the entranceway to the house is situated on one of LA's hilly neighborhood's massive staircases between upper and lower blocks. I was under the impression that there was private parking or at least street level parking up top but not only was that not the case, the upper street closest to the house was narrow af and crazy loaded down with no parking signs for driveways etc everywhere so instead of walking up and down like two flights of stairs, I was stuck parking on the lower staircase street and my fat ass was forced to hoof ALL OF MY SHIT up and down SEVEN massive flights over and over and over again every day in the oppressing heatwave they just happen to be having that week with the usually cloudless bland blue sky and sun beating down on me for every step..
It was one of those places that has this whole kick ass vintage vibe and naturally, you want to save and preserve it. Problem is that it wasn't actually that special to begin with and is so janky and awkwardly built, at this point its basically a tear down and or in dire need of a full renovation. Yup, nothing quite like airbnb pictures not matching reality..
Then I made a big wooden box- TWICE
Let's back up to before the trip while I was getting ready. I couldn't help but think, you know, if only I had the dimensions of the jig it would make things a bit easier. Then realized- wait, I still have the side panels to the box my first Anvil jig came in! They were perfect for cars to roll up onto during maintenance. My cars are so low it requires at least a two inch lift for a low profile jack to even fit under them, lol. The point being- I had my measurements! ..or so I thought. I had some scrap lying around and since I wasn't going to be there long, I figured why not pack my suitcase with as many pre cut pieces I could fit to get a head start. I was leaving Wednesday and returning Saturday so I didn't have to miss Sunday lunch with the fam..
I had the whole trip schedule long written in my mind before even stepping on the flight. Which essentially all went out the fucking door thanks to a flight delay heading out to start with, which initiated a cascade effect that bled into every other fucking thing of course, lol it was def a one annoying thing after another kind of trip but in a good problem to have kinda way..
The next day I went to home depot with my handy pre-measured map of all the cuts I needed made with the least amount of cuts required:
Later on that night I made the run out to pick up the jig. The previous owner was cool and had just used it to make a few frames for himself. He's got something else I'd like to get my filthy mitts on so we'll see how things shape up in the new year..
So here's where things get fun. As I'm getting the box ready to assemble, I take some measurements on the jig just in case and hey guess what it's like HALF AN INCH longer than my original box measurements which then required me to go BACK to fucking home depot and have a whole bunch of new pieces cut to spec and LUG UP THOSE FUCKING STAIRS AGAIN. My assumption is that somewhere in the 5 years after I got my jig, Don might have lengthened part of the main body slightly..? No clue other than I know Don retired a few years later..
I know it sounds like I'm whinging but let me tell you fucking pussies I RELISHED THE SUFFERING as it was decried to me that I was to receive all I need to bring ruin to those who deceive and thrive on greed. I was on mission for the cycling gods and no trial or tribulation, including my own or others folly, could ever stand in the way of whats sure to be my greatest creations. My legs may have been burning every day but failure wasn't a thought, only forward momentum..
Box version 2.0 completed:
Now came zero hour when I had to haul all that shit to the UPS. I would've LOVED to have been able to take my time, pack everything really well and toss it in the whip. The only problem was there would've been no way for me to lift the box with the jig inside of it, at least not safely, which led to quite possibly the gnarliest thrash boxing session ever in the UPS parking lot. Believe me, I would've preferred to deal with all this shit more appropriately but time wasn't on my side and I had to split the next day..
I was PRAYING there'd be a shaded area for me to work there but nope. I did have a nice space to work but with no shade in sight. It was brutal. I was out there for like 2 hours slogging away cutting and screwing pieces everywhere like a goddamn cartoon fight sweating my balls off. Dudes from the offices/businesses would walk by me on their lunch break and be like- Dude what are you getting down to out here, do you need some water?! I must have looked insane drenched with sweat and covered in sawdust with a handsaw ready to faint which is why I have ZERO photos from the whole escapade..
Although.. I did see a sign..
I was probably about 3/4's of the way through assembly and hurting. I still had a little water left and what I could tell would be just enough wood, screws and battery life to complete the task. There was a bit of shade from the rental car (A late model Nissan Altima, nice but nothing special aside from being just a fine all around kinda whip, better than a tiny eco box) so I could at least take little breaks. You have to understand I'm sitting in a parking lot out in the open with this big open box and the jig inside. I was stuck there til I was done and the UPS was closing soon..
In the middle of all this, as I was leaning over the box making adjustments with the handsaw in my other hand which was also holding my weight on the box, when out of nowhere, a Monarch butterfly landed on the saw blade handle right by my hand. I noticed it out of the corner of my eye, it sat there for a second and then flew away. Not thinking much of it, I turned back to my work. Then, like 30 seconds later while I was in a similar position, another Monarch butterfly flew over and landed on the saw blade handle by my hand again. Which naturally caught my attention more this time so I paused for a moment and starred at it through my sweaty glasses. This time it did that thing where they're just perched on something and it slowly flapped its wings up and down.. and up and down.. repeatedly, like it was yawning. The craziest thing happened next when suddenly that frantic feeling of anxiety, sweat and pain completely drained from my thoughts, burning muscles and sun scorched skin like water flowing down a drain. Slightly confused, but elated and with a sense of appreciation for the fleeting moment of relief, I uttered with a smile- "Thanks buddy" and then it flew away. I watched it saunter off into the sky for a moment before getting back to work calmly and effectively. The dude at the UPS was super Cali cool and was a big help with getting that monstrosity shipped out. It's not everyday you find yourself shipping something super heavy and expensive that's easily over 200lbs from somewhere unfamiliar. I'd been to LA a few times in the past so I get it but still..
There was a mini mart across the blvd from the UPS so I rewarded myself with a gatorade and granola bar to chew on, went back to the lesbo palace, took a shower, took a nap, THEN TOOK MYSELF OUT ON DA TOWN!! Just kidding of course as I was destroyed so instead I FEASTED like a fucking KING at Guisado's:
I realize it looks like I'm eating dog shit tacos in that lighting as the photo does it no justice but let me tell you something SO FUCKING GOOD that by the fourth day of me showing up in a row like the familiar breeze of a hungry specter the workers were like- yo whats your deal gringo? and I was like- Ha!, I'm from Jersey, we don't have it like this out there and they were all low key like aww yeaaah das right puto! They even pulled up their socks to reveal their cons and starting doing that cholo hoodrat dance! Well, they were in my head anyways and if you think thats rrracist then there's a pretty good chance you're just another run of the mill no talent ghey loser, lol just stop there's nothing wrong with someone appreciating imaginary cholo shit INSIDE THEIR HEAD wtf calm down shit was tight af in tha 90's holmes just go get another booster whydontcha duuuuuuhhhhhh besides they love that shit too stop playin'..
Next up are LA food scenester twats that likely want to drag me for such an obvious choice but whatever man I had a great fucking time every time. I'm legit ready to fly back just for the tacos, lol let me know what I'm missing out on if its so special! I don't have the patience to weed through the gay old lib review sites I used to like until I really didn't, lol wtf its def not me who's the vile degenerate plotting scoundrel, just the stubborn one that could see the line in the sand and wasn't fool hearty enough step over it..
Normally after a hard days work I'll just SLAY a dozen or so egg whites, pan fried in the pure olive oil I make myself from my ancestors land along with a little Croatian sea salt and it b amazin'..
I like to sizzle it til it starts to get a nice bit of crispiness going but sadly that couldn't happen because the bad ass old school vintage stove with all these sick ass pipes and knobs everywhere that I was reeeeeaaaally looking forward to using was covered up by this douchey little piece of marble etc with a hot plate on top so between that and the ants it would've been a bit of an embarrassment for me to even consider cooking in that POS kitchen set up..
After I stuffed my gullet with Guisados, I attempted to walk it off with a little tour around the various 'galleries' and 'book stores' in Echo Park where aside from quite possibly THE WORST MOST INFANTILE AND GROTESQUE 'art' ever, I noticed way more broads looking at me than I'm used to. Which likely had less to do with my admittedly stunning goods looks than the fact the 'dudes' in that 'hood' RADIATED beta like you wouldn't believe. Not one dude had any meaningful facial hair and they all looked like toothpicks a light fart could knock over..
I know what you're thinking- Beta?! Weren't you just talking about butterflies?
Yes. Just like I talked about these Monarchs in 2017 WITH VIDEO EVIDENCE:
I'm allowed to trip out on butterflies forming Orions belt and a Pyramid after getting stoned and watching Ancient Aliens for HOLY CRAP they're on season 21 now?!! Hilarious! Again, for the millionth time, forget about the alien etc shit and just watch it for the archeology and various sites they go to- ULTRA FASCINATING and you seldom learn about any of that kinda shit anywhere else so it's fun :-)
Thankfully despite all the running around I did get to do the ONE touristy thing I wanted to do- go visit 'The Crucifixion' and let me tell you it did NOT disappoint!:
What a sight to behold!
I took a snap for perspective only- our boy in the middle is roughly 1:1 in size so that should give you an idea of its enormity. The story behind it is amazing too. First popularized in the mid/late 1800's, it was a MARVELOUS way to immerse yourself in various, usually historic scenes, by viewing massive panoramic paintings shown in the round called a Cyclorama, kind of like this:
The entire grandiose presentation was the greatest fucking thing ever from a purely technical perspective, esp when they bring out the companion painting- 'The Resurrection'. I would LOVE to get a closer look at that whole mechanism's inner workings..
An overall 10 out of 10, would def recommend viewing it during a guided tour presentation ππ
It's funny cause I only vaguely recall seeing something about the painting years ago but all I retained was that it was massive and in LA. When my friend was asking what I wanted to do while I was in town I was like, well, I can't stand being around tons of assholes, esp if they're of the LA variety, so lets just do something chill. She was like, well lets just go walk around Forest Lawn then! We went to the Museum, saw the large mausoleums and checked out the grounds. I was extra stoked as they had Fig and Madrone trees on the grounds just like in DA HOMELAND so like the good lil' slav monkey I am, ran up into a tree to grab a quick taste :-)
This is the view down into one of the restricted basement areas:
My friend: "I've never been down there but have always wondered what it was like"
Me: "Thats probably where they rape and kill the kids, lol!"
A few more:
You really should take a moment to read this:
(a couple of her snaps)
My friend mentioned this other building there but it was always closed and had never been inside. She literally lives in the same fucking area (Glendale) and it was the first time she's ever been to the building in question AND had no idea about the painting's existence outside of me being like- "I'd like to go see this crazy massive painting but I totally forgot everything about it". When we walked in the painting was in full view through the hall entrance doors and I was like- "Holy shit- this is the place!" Both aghast at what we accidentally and coincidentally stumbled upon, we excitedly entered the hall and headed down the walkway. As the full spectacle of The Crucifixion came into view, I couldn't help but think back to that calmness I felt while thanking my little butterfly buddy from the day before..
Then I flew home..
I anticipated DA JIGZ arrival not long after returning 2 THA JEEERRRRRZZZZ as it had a bit of a head start..
Thankfully it arrived intact tho the box essentially disintegrated after I took this photo like hoooooly shit, fucking thing lasted just long enough..
Here's what it looked like when you popped one of these bad boys open direct from Don at Anvil circa 2012:
Unlike Don, I had the option of lightening the load a bit by tossing what I could in my luggage..
Naturally I rehashed my old height adjustable rolling stand design with the help of metal supermarkets that had a set of smooth fitting size box tubing for the verticle beam that raises. I don't even want to talk about how I got the tubes to fit into each other in the original stand, lol so stupid..
The only steel I had lying around was some 2" box tubing which would've been fine had it not been 1/16th sidewall so I figured it could use a little extra bolstering..
So there you have it!:
MISSION SUCCESS!!!
Suffice it to say the cycling gods are VERY pleased with yours truly and if you know whats good for ya so should you..
You'll also be pleased to learn I picked up an anvil fork jig like a year ago as well:
Bitchin'..
That fork set up was part of the next build I had in mind before I began my little hiatus, lol can you guess what it'll be??? π
Here's another clue:
I made my selections and tossed it in that box over a decade ago..
Everyone could've enjoyed watching that beast and many others roll down the street but a lot of y'all chose to excoriate the very worst person and engaged in an endless amount of blatantly obvious stupidity instead, fucking morons..
While it would've been more economical had I seen that the same guy who sold me the fork jig had previously sold the same anvil frame jig a couple of months earlier and only lived all of like 45 min away, it would've saved me two shit loads of time, money and effort but then I wouldn't have eaten yummy tacos or had quite as much fun suffering for the cycling gods. They knew they couldn't make things too easy for me in order to put my resilience to the test!
But no worries cause overall it was a good time, a fantastic workout with solid food, good moods and lil duuuudes!
Cool shit yes no?
More cool shit to come as the Trinity Grail find series continues into 2026!!
Anywho, just figured I'd bang out one last fun post for the year and wish everyone:
A VERY MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!
..and happy new year :-)
jk I hope all you twats got coal because y'all deserve it fr..
(This is probably the only time you'll ever read a story involving butterflies that doesn't take you straight to gaytown, lmfao)
THE TRINITY GRAIL FIND SERIES 2025!! Chapter 3: ESCAPE FROM LA
Hello everyone, how y'all doin'? I hope everyones mental health has been holding up and not hanging from the string you've been fed for profit at the expense of your livelihood just to keep you hanging off their dicks the same way you'd dangle a carrot in front of a donkey to carry a heavy load LAUGH MY FUCKING ASS OFF!!!
The funniest shit is how working in various NYC (not so) based publishing houses FOR 30 YEARS NOW somehow makes my insider commentary so irrelevant that it requires censorship via repeated shadowbanning and bs 'community strikes' because something about my pointing out the obvious makes me the 'bad guy', hooolllyy shit the stupidityastounds..
In fact, heres a few great examples of me shitting on them:
Some asshole huh?
Well hey guess the fuck what I'm allowed to be. I LOVED working there until I reeeally didn't because it got creepy, gross and weird. Not that I had many better options available to me at the time having made it easier for people to enjoy legal weed by taking one for the team back in the dizzay and getting caught up in the system (mid 90's) over an ounce of devil's lettuce and an 8th of mushrooms- OH MAI GAWD!! Ruin that guys life immediately!! Watching SUBURBAN PIGS joyfully high five each other like a couple of apparatchiks over my desire to provide what I knew then to be 'medicine' which is now legal to people simply because those things helped me when I was coming of age in what felt like a foreign country with a civil war always knocking at my front door. Then, not a few years later at the ripe old age of 19, I found myself in the belly of Rolling Stone Magazines beast and what a beast it was at times while also being some of the best of times. Why shouldn't I be critical? You think I don't care? It's actually quite the opposite..
Yup, nothing quite like knowing I won't get a job because I'm forced to tick a box admitting to being 'guilty' of a 'crime' while some HR broad clutches her pearls with a weed pen hanging out of her purse give me a fucking break π€¦
So yeah, I've been 'the bad guy', repeatedly, since the 90's. Just labeled as one of course since I KNEW FOR A FACT I LITERALLY DID NOTHING WRONG. Naturally I stopped caring about being on lists or burning bridges a loooooong time ago, lol bunch of fucking lily livered twats put on a bunch of gear, guns and are brainwashed by pedo pets who constantly laugh and poke fun at how blatantly dumb their useful idiots had become all for a few meager checks to pretend they have the moral authority to lord over all the rest while ignoring the real issues that desperately need to be addressed..
At this point I'm sure all you really want is for me to get down to the nitty gritty already so lets just dive into the backstory a bit shant we?
SSSHHHHAAANNTTTTT WEEEEEE??????
..we shall
..but lets preface all this with something I like to tell my nieces, nephews and various villainous street rapscallions I come into contact with:
Just because you can, doesn't mean you should..
I can sell everything I own, move to Thailand etc, pay $6-700 a month for a penthouse with a pool and a view, eat the best food and pound fresh cooz every night but I don't. Instead I build odd shit for like minded weirdos and run my mouth on the net when I'm not manning the grill family Sundays..
I shouldn't have to explain it beyond that for you to understand. You either will if you're not completely lost, or you'll scoff at it because you're completely lost. Trust me, you just are and you need to do some finding but listen, I'll do you a solid with a quick pro tip:
Do not become a slave to freedom..
Right then, so I was going through some old paperwork a few years back of drawings and ideas from the height of the WMD dayz, when this little doodle caught my attention:
I'd been wanting to build a GT style triple triangle mini tall from essentially the beginning of when my mini tall madness first began..
I haven't even bothered with coming up with anything new btw, all I have to do is pick up where I left off and to be honest, some of those designs are so ahead of their time I STILL think people won't get it but we're way past me giving a flying fuckaroo about what a bunch of no talent arm chair critic LOSERS lost in their self aggrandizing they mistake as omnipotence have to say. Sorry suckaz, you can pretend to be me but you just aren't and in all likelihood, never will be..
Considering how much of a fucking dumbass I am thats not really saying much only proving how unconscionably pathetic the haters are- good god..
Eventually leading me to create this doodle during a stay in DA HOMELAND:
Which then opened the door to what all REAL MEN SAVOR..
Thats right.. It was time..
TIME 2 ZET UP SHOP!!!
So I moved in earnest henceforth to create a space worthy of a WEAPON OF MASS DESTRUCTION!!!
I had already purchased a MIG welder the year prior for another project, the Yugoslav era door restore, which you can view in my insta highlights, so I was ready to go on that front:
First, I built a proper new welding table:
More photos from the build described:
Came out great right?!
I think so and u should too..
Not only was I stoked on how great the table came out, but I was SUPER STOKED on finding a local source for welding gasses:
Initially I was worried I'd be forced to finally learn how to TIG weld but having an oxy acetylene set up is just way more familiar and useful FOW DA KINDA SHIT AH B DOIN'..
Which then led to buying a sweet new torch set up:
The only problem is the German made oxygen regulators threads were way off from the Croatian 02 bottle threads leading to a nearly two year, two visits to DA HOMELAND anyways, before I could find something even close to the correct size and then locating someone with a lathe that could rethread it for me to make it fit properly WHAT A FUCKING PAIN IN THE BALLS. I was literally derailed for 2 years because of a fucking thread fitment issue, so fucking stupid!!
My boys shop in Kali:
If you're wondering wtf I'm still doing in the statez fear not, for I often ask myself that very same question..
Anyways, I went ahead and returned the tiny vise in the photo of the table once I realized I could have a more substantial (and almost identical to the vise I have in my old shop space) shipped to my door:
Bitchin'..
At this point I felt confident enough to pick up a tube set and brazing supplies from Ceeway in da UK..
YOU KNOW WHERE THEY ALLOW LOW IQ THIRD WORLD RETARDS GET AWAY WITH GANG RAPING LITTLE GIRLS WHILE THE GRANDSONS OF THEIR D-DAY SURVIVORS SUCK COCK FOR CANDY BECAUSE WHY WOULD ANY OF THAT CONCERN WOMEN BEATING PEDOPHILES??
Imagine being that much of a soul selling moron huh? THANK GOD my ancestors aren't looking down on me with that level of disappointment jesus fucking christ..
As for myself, you can clearly see that the cycling gods blessed me with their golden seal of approval- and joyfully!:
Sadly, with the trips not being the longest, the adapter issue, progress was slow along with various other chores that required my attention around Casa SikiriΔ but I was only able to get a few things prepped for the following year..
Here's a little taste of said various chores and still way more in store for me, you and all the censors too!
While technically not being anything to write home about, it's more about the sentiment behind it..
The same sentiment was behind my involvement in whats become known as 'The Great MEME War'
ITZA LONG ZTORY
Basically I stopped doing what I enjoyed, to do what I knew needed to be done..
..along with my own personal experience during a trip to Sarajevo in 1999 - "If I don't do it, no one will"
Can't tell you how loud that man's words still resonate in my mind to this day..
The best part is while my various ENEMIES were mearly play acting their favorite 'game of thrones' character aka the dick riding ladder to suck sess(pool of mostly you know whooz), where as here in the real world where the actual adults play, their countries of 'origin' are currently sucking down platters of shit sandwiches fed to them by design of which there appears to be no end in sight, while mine is currently thriving as one of world's top travel destinations of all time:
Which also just happens to be one of the safest places for women and children to walk around at night likely having something to do with it not being a sanctuary for convicted pedos fleeing prosecution and imported muzzie grooming gangs, wtf..
I could've just taken the arrows, kept my mouth shut, stayed in my lane and profited like everyone else but instead I chose to speak to the people on their terms so they knew what could be expected in the coming years and hopefully avoid the various unforeseen pitfalls that befell me. Which is why it's unwise to tell a balkan lies as its sure to lead to your own demise..
In other words:
I WIN
MOVING ON..
Before we get to the good stuff, there was something that needed to be cleared up. A question that had spent years lingering in my mind. A burning desire for an answer gnawing at me like the faint perception of a bad omen..
..is there any way..?
..could it work..?
..would it be possible..?
..to gather a bunch of random readily available off the shelf hardware store parts and plain steel for a low down and dirty bang for your buck freak bike frame jig???
...aaaaaaand the short answer is a resounding: YES!!!
Lesbos and gentleMEN, I proudly present something I'd like to call:
Jigger-riggederous Maximus, First of his name, creator of the new realm!!!
..because #frankenframebuildingjig is a thing now and nobody can stop me. Try me I fucking dare you. I’ll give it the other name- BEELEEDAT!!
I also made a fork jig naturally, tho I admit the welds are HORRIFIC due to there being an extra knob on the newer welder along with having not used it for a couple of years, my dumbass couldn't be bothered figuring it out on a test piece. Nope, I decided the best course of action was to muddle my way through on the final piece, lol wtf figure it out on a test piece instead of just going for it stupid!
..whatever:
..the results?
MY GIFT TO THE CYCLING GODS FOR BLESSING ME WITH THE THREE GRAILS TO LIGHT MY PATH TO FRAME BUILDING REDEMPTION!!
BEHOLD
THE SPECTACLE
THAT IS:
THE FOURTH HORSEMAN
Dressed in what I'm calling- 'Black Squid' paint to honor my Croatian island hometown's wondrous yearly Crnilo Kup (black cup) squid festival and competition:
Black squid sounds more pirate-y than black cup but I dig it either way despite not being super into squid or fishing or being on or in the ocean very much either which probably sounds super retarded being that I'm from a fucking island but ALL Y'ALL NIZZAZ KNOW AH WUZ RAISED IN DEEZ NYC/NJ STRRREEEEETZ which doesn't sound any less retarded and being a pirate would be pretty cool but skateboards, bicycles, motorcycles, cars and low level CRIMES are street things that I grew up doing and not ocean or WAR things sadly. So while the ocean kinda scares the shit out of me, weaving through traffic doing triple digits past the fuzz on the thruway barely raises my pulse..
(I have no idea what happened to the sound)
Another for instance:
I went to pick up these gay new STARCK glasses from Alain Mikili on Madison and 77th aka THE CUNTIEST neighborhood ever! ..which is exactly why I shop there, lol its fun to watch rich old broads look at me like a piece of meat to be devoured the same way I look past them at whatever fancier than fuck thing is on their brunch plate not as tasty as I walk by ngl a sugar mama that needs to be dominated would help my budget out since none of you stingy bastards will ☝ π€ π π΅
Then cruised downtown and grabbed lunch at Curry in a Hurry afterwords (its not about it being that good, its about nostalgia), a buffet style Indian place I’ve been enjoying since college that hasn’t changed at all, esp the food, so it’s a fav. Shot this gay video of lunch along with my 2013 BMW S1000RR NOW BOASTING 28,000+ MILES:
Then almost died 30 min later at the hands of police and or some bs three letter agency in two huge blacked out police suburbans right as I was exiting the Lincoln tunnel off ramp:
Feel free to use the white van as perspective only like 50' closer, lol basically the same size of the van in placement only you're close enough to touch it without fully extending your arm.
They came at me HEAD ON GOING THE WRONG WAY ON THE EXIT RAMP FOR THE LINCOLN FUCKING TUNNEL IN THE MIDDLE OF THE AFTERNOON while I was on my motorcycle, lol wtf it was like experiencing a scene out of an action movie fucking twats didn’t even bother stopping to make sure I was okay. We were both going like 30-35mph and while the first one veered out of the way, I EASILY could’ve touched the second one it was so close whizzing by me. Thankfully I didn't have to put my bike and GLORIOUS SELF into the wall to avoid BEING HIT HEAD ON since I was somehow able to come to a stop on the gravel and broken glass covered median..
This is pretty close to what is was like only they were slightly larger/older vehicles coming at me way faster and seemingly closer:
As you can imagine I’m feeling even saltier than usual, if thats even possible. It didn't turn me into a pussy or anything but that would've just been a shit way to go- at the hands of a bunch of jack boot thugs acting like assholes that lick their masters boots for profit, fucking scumbags. I pulled up next to the cager at the following intersection who was right behind me WITH HIS WIFE AND KID and I was like- "Dude- did you see that?!" and he's like- "Yeah, I had to stop short to avoid them hitting me head on too, fucking assholes!" All because they needed to make a u-turn and went the WAY wrong way the stupid bastards..
Its a shame I wasn't driving a fucking semi..
Just to illustrate where that COMPLETELY WARRANTED sentiment comes from..
I was watching the news with my mother when Beyonce's little mishap was shown:
I glance over for her SPIZEY HOT TAKE and she's like: "It's too bad it didn't tip over all the way"
HILARIOUS
Then like a week later I'm once again watching the news with her when Katie Perry has a similar incident:
Me: "Hey mom, isn't that funny, the same thing almost happened to Beyonce last week"
My mother: "It wouldn't have been a bad thing, disgusting.."
I'd tell you her reaction to a certain special dance music video made about bombs dropping on that place that the people who don't have control over everything would censor immediately because being ironically hypocritical isn't super telling behavior but suffice it to say her SPIZEY HOT TAKE on that topic was also incredibly fucking hilarious..
Obviously I love her but she's def a bit of a beast. Which makes dealing with her a somewhat of a loathsome affair but a 5th grade education level from the 50's will do that to a person but she likely wouldn't have much of a sense of humor or work ethic either if she had an 'education' so you've got to pick and choose your battles..
ANYways, as you can see it turns out it is possible for your average monkey brained Slav to eyeball a jig set up well enough to make an original design mini tall bike frame that's way more interesting than half the ULTRA BORING TRASH that’s out there ON GOD despite THE FACT that it’s the first frame I’ve built AND first time I picked up a torch, brazed etc IN LIKE A DECADE and while I made a bunch of stupid mistakes it rides FANTASTIC so fucking take that shit all you loser commie fucks! Pivot from accurately predicting the future and dismantling obvious bullshit narratives sold for profit by TRAITORS to making custom one off bicycle frames, again. DID I MENTION I BUILT 90% of it in 5 days???? PLZ TRY ME BITCH!!
Some DEETZ from DA BUILD:
As per usual I started out with some silly doodles:
I would've preferred to go with the final full framed version but I knew I couldn't get the outer frame built anywhere near as square as I would've liked without having a proper surface plate, not to mention materials costing more, so I went with the single rail version for now. In the future I would go with the full frame version once I can get my filthy mitts on some 80/20 awn da cheap..
First thing was how to clamp the tubes in properly. I picked the lathe tailstock chucks along with these curtain rod holders made from very precise aluminum:
The half circle indent that holds the curtain rod was just the right size for the chuck spindle to fit. The screws to hold said rod in good enough to hold the chucks in place, although I did have them torpedo to the ground a couple of times, thankfully when I wasn't underneath them π¬
They were pretty much perfect as is but I did have to fab up steel mounts in order to 'properly' attach them to the 'jig':
Brazing the fork crown:
..along with the fork jig in action:
Despite buying the longest steerer tube available I still needed to freak bike an extension in there which was annoying but whatevz dis jus tha werld ah b livin' in u kno?!
As you can imagine I had a lot of fun getting the GT seat stay mitre just right since I needed the other tube to have as much room as possible for the INTERNAL BRAKE CABLE GUIDE to fit properly:
DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW LONG I'VE BEEN WANTING TO DO AN INTERNAL CABLE GUIDE THROUGH A GT SEAT STAY FOR??? It was super tricky getting it right but I made it work and took exactly zero photos of the process because I was so focused and manic at the time..
Here's a couple of close up mitres along with a head tube spacer I used to help figure out the geometry by including the headset cup height:
Here's the front TRAPEZOID all set up and ready for brazing with a cardboard 1:1 drawing in the background that served as a loose guide:
How about my sweet TT holder, lol:
I put a piece of metal between the garage door rails overhead and tied a string to that piece of wire, squeezing the middle together for fine adjustment..
..aaand brazing complete:
One day I'll have some mini tall dropouts custom cut for me but until then I'm stuck making my own..
Add on pieces fabricated:
Best way for me to weld em nice and straight was by tossing em in the vise:
MIG welded and cleaned up:
Bolted together nice to finish everything up:
..and there you have it!
..they came out decent enough anyways..
Since I have zero photos from working on the stays and internal brake line, here's a shitty photo of the super structure all complete:
..and finally, here's my worktable once the whirlwind that is my INCALCULABLE GENIUS, now satiated, took rest:
Please bear in mind aside from the torch set up not pictured, these are the ONLY tools I had at my disposal:
This is why taking master Yamaguchi's frame building course is so important to the average low buck builder. You learn how to do more with less. Plenty of links about my trip to his shop in Colorado on the sidebar..
Learning how to do things analogue is WAY more time consuming but in the end, will only add to your skill set and level of understanding you have for the medium. The more skills you gather, the easier and faster it will be to pick up new ones as each lends itself to the other..
Its the same with photography. I took numerous college courses for years and learned the fine art of analogue film developing, processing and printing the old way along with how to recognize moments, see the light for what is along with developing a style and skill set that best suits my desire to appropriately convey a message to the viewer. That along with study, dedicating a good portion of time and money into it for decades also helped refine my skills and I put as much of myself into it as I can. Oh and I was also Rolling Stone Magazine's 'assistant' production manager for over a decade as well but whatever..
Just because your average schmo can pick up a cheap digital camera, leave it on automatic and take some 'decent' photos after watching a few youtube tutorial videos makes them 'think' they're the shit while simultaneously making everyone around them barf in their collectives mouths a little bit knowing that trying to explain their disdain to the hopelessly undisciplined rabble only interested in polaroid like results as opposed to oh I don't know, putting in enough time and effort into literally anything to the point where they'd realize thinking they know better and actually knowing better, are two very different things. Though they'd have to be willing to move beyond their over inflated egos and feckless narcissism to begin with and we all know that won't happen for most of them..
At the end of the day, my janky ass jig contraption worked SHOCKINGLY WELL for the wonky piece of shit that it is. Right about now some DOOM COUGH is screaming: 'DUUUUHHH why didn’t you just use 80/20, its way more accurate?!' For the same reason our version of Home Depot has a bar out front and yours doesn't..
Though to be honest it was a COLOSSAL pain the balls to deal with at times. I couldn't properly tighten the bolts down without having to constantly check alignment and level etc for every time I bumped in to it or was fitting tubes, which became TIRESOME AS FUCK. I would say 'JIGGER adjustment fatigue' is what did me in more than anything else. I mean, you have seen me haven't you? The biggest issue, aside from making it big enough to handle a mini tall frame, was that I wasn’t able to mount the rear dropout holder post as properly as I'd originally designed due to a lack of proper materials that I wasn't willing to make another trip to the mainland for as it would've really screwed me up time wise. Despite everything the stays came out pretty great and are only slightly off. Still mechanically sound so whatevz!
Hence my starting this whole thing off by pointing out that just because you can, doesn't mean you should. You CAN pull this sort of thing off for a few hundred bucks but I'm not saying you should or shouldn't. I just wanted to see if it was possible for an overzealous hobbyist to pull it off on their own with whatever they've got readily available to them. What can I say- I'm a fan of experimental drudgery..
Guys, its my first hand built frame IN OVER A DECADE NO WARM UP TO PAINTED AND ROLLING IN 5 DAYS DESPITE SOME WHOPPER MISTAKES WITH ZERO CLEANING AND FILING AND STILL CRUISES AND LOOKS AWESOME FROM 10 FEET AWAY HOW CAN YOU NOT LOVE IT??? FUCK OFF I KNOW FOR A FACT THE CYCLING GODS HAVE BLESSED MY HANDS WITH THEIR DIVINE FAVOR!!!
You're not going to believe this but despite my long hiatus, it turns out that frame building....is a lot like riding a bicycle..
AAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
What do you think this shit goes away simply because I’ve been inconvenienced by a bunch of unbearably miserable, ignorant, wicked narcissistic rich daddies boys, no talent cowards and lying, cheating, thieving two bit whores buffoonery because they were so desperate to be looked at as 'tough and cool' while somehow being the SOFTEST FUCKING LOSERS on the planet that turn their crooked noses up at anyone they deem beneath them from a gilded cage and were more than willing to die at the alter of being a useful idiot for their corporate masters instead of taking the longer path to enjoy the authentic lore that surrounds NIZZAZ LIKE ME AND NOT U FUKEN PUSSIEEEZZZZ. What's really hilarious is how people assume I’m talking about them when in reality I’m just fishing for a response to confirm my suspicions amongst A COMPLETELY RANDOM GROUP OF PEOPLE THAT HAVE EXHIBITED SIMILAR PATTERNS OF GARBAGE BEHAVIOR AND NOT JUST ONE OF 'YOU'. IN OTHER WORDS, CALM DOWN STUPID, ITZ NOT PERSONAL, ITS JUST REPEATED INFORMATIONAL OBSERVATION aka that ultra naughty phrase people despise when a mirror is held up to them- PATTERN RECOGNITION. So feel free to take comfort in knowing 'you' def aren't the only juan out there akin' da fool. Also, and this may shock some of you, I'll even detect said shit behavior radiating from myself. Its called making the necessary course corrections by TAKING PERSONAL ACCOUNTABILITY instead of pretending that slapping a veneer over it OR PROJECTING YOUR OWN GUILT ONTO OTHERS will make it go away. You know, that thing YOU KNOW WHO JUST CAN'T DO BECAUSE THEIR SCHMANCY OLD BOOK TELLS THEM THEY DON'T HAVE TO. Keep in mind I'm not the one taxing you 40% to FREELY rape and bomb children because a false book of outlandish sociopathic egomaniacal pretentiousness said its okay, I'M JUST GOOD AT RETAINING MENTAL FOOTNOTES - SORRY NOT SORRY!! I oversee the upgrading and institution of complex publishing workflow systems for million dollar publishing companies along with being a classically trained documentary style photographer. I spend a lot of time watching and analyzing people to optimize performance, understanding the necessities of escalated workflows and tell anyone the that refuses to fall in line to hit the bricks. Thats literally what I do. I even go on little weekend excursions and do personal little social studies in my spare time for fun..
For instance, I've been going to gun shows for decades. At first, I used to just throw on a flannel and pretend I was one of them to strike up what I thought were hilariously preposterous conversations. Now I walk around them with my ultra nationalist Croatian hoody and strike up awkward conversations with my fellow ex-yugoslavs across tables full of dubious 'legally destroyed' weapons that are now classified as 'scrap metal' and various other relics from a war I just missed while surrounded by two shit tons of firearms and ammo not to mention that one guy that sells this kick ass venison jerky. What do you think I'm also somehow blessed with the ability to shut this shit off? I look at it as an annoyingly cliche ying/yang figurine thats always looming over whatever the fuck this thing I'm 'experiencing' is in a random dimension of projected reality that I could be freely navigating on my own but I've been unwittingly brainwashed by shape shifting reptilians into a state of low vibration thinking any of this stupid shit going on around me is even 'real'..
God I've missed freshly grown weed!!
I mean how tf is it 'legal' now but takes a year to reach me?
But I digress, were you expecting things to go out like a bang and not be drawn out for years??
Do you want to know why?
Tell me what could one knowing me extrapolate from these two awards of mine from high school:
What else prey tell was going on in my life in 1991 and 1992 you fucking morons?!
I was getting ready to go to war..
I excelled in metal working because I knew I’d have to make WEAPONS and or KILLDOZER LIKE VEHICLES converted from farm equipment and freight trucks like these specimens on display at The Croatian Homeland War Museum:
I. KNEW.
Doπ Youπ Understandπ Yetπ
In fact, a whole gunsmithing industry was spawned during the war and continues to this day:
I mean wow so complicated a kid with a semester of metal working experience could easily build one. It's not like I was making sling shot pistols to start with zero training:
Can't imagine what someone with a couple of decades worth of metalworking education and experience in tinkering could pull off, LOL
What makes me like this is growing up yearning for a chance to go to war in protection of my family, land and people. I grew up hearing first hand WWII stories my father experienced as a child growing up during the war. Sadly, my war was over before it started for me tho I did get a little taste of it which you can read for yourself in one of my art projects called poserwarstory. Just a little something I worked on having switched gears from cycling commentary and fabrication to political commentary and meme warfare:
Just to illustrate how well my little story has aged like fine wine, check out this excerpt I posted in 2018 along with its 'art imitates life' sort of meme I spotted a couple years later:
Which I then thought would be fun to add some visuals to for shits and giggles. Keep in mind I went to photography school and barely know anything about video and editing. Also the 'films', dare I say, make more sense if you read the zine booklet FIRST you lazy, lazy cunts..
Knowing how retarded most people are I made TWO SHIT TONS of episode trailer type memez to help explain, excite and weird people tf out..
There's well over a hundred but these are some of my favz. Ep1 was essentially a trailer in and of itself so these are for Ep 2&3:
Now.. without further adieu..
Episode 1: Brothers and the Beast
Episode 2: The White Man's Ghetto
Episode 3: You Reap what you Sow in this White Man's Ghetto
Cringe af right? I know- PURE UNADULTERATED GEEENNNNIIIIIOOOUUUSSSZZZZ!!! I knew you'd enjoy them as much as they'd boggle some most of your pea brains. In fact they're SO FUN and SO CRINGE that I've gotten essentially ZERO feedback from any of my 'contemporaries' aka rich daddies boys that suck cock for candy, lmfao, yeah, they're THAT awesome! Imagine having the power to shut scum drenched lips, lol what a bunch of fags..
To be clear for the crunchy twats out there: It's not that I have an issue with the gays, I have an issue with rich daddies boys that treat women like garbage while they're 'straight' but then suck their way into even more power/privilege when its 'convenient', then point the finger at literally anyone else for being the 'bad guy' by simply exposing their corruption and degeneracy INSTEAD OF BEING THEIR ACCOMPLICE. They literally get super mad at you for not being as vile and disgusting as they are and then proceed to attack your character like a little girl. The fact that I have to explain any of that just proves how demoralized society has become..
There's actually another reason why I've essentially gotten no feedback and I guarantee its not because of my lack of technical skills or that I'm incompetent, lmfao!
It's because most of you are pussies, lol jk but not really unless you want to explain why most of you are too scared to tap a smooth piece of glass out of fear of social stigma. Who are you afraid of- cowards that puff their chests out while flaunting their daddies credit card? Because what- everyone else thinks they're cool and you just want to a part of the 'in' crowd? The same ones so desperate to fit in they're totally cool with the room burning all around them- really??
I engaged in all that nonsense because I felt MORALLY OBLIGATED to speak up where others shriveled in cowardice, along with my background in media, being from the Balkans and a hobby writer of sorts. It was NECESSARY for me to step up and write FOR the people and not the select few who believe its their mission to rule over those they deem beneath them which is literally everyone who isn't them. Its a common behavior I've observed over DECADES which wouldn't mean shit if it wasn't for my credentials. I've been on the inside. The vast majority of you HAVE NOT and as far as anyone can tell, I have no reason to profit off and lie to YOU. I'd rather just earn your fan faire fair and square. So be sure to high five me on the way overboard with the sounds of strings looming over all that flee as the bow begins to list vertically..
Did I mention I used to converse regularly with Peter Travers and the likes about movies and music? Oh and my sister was second in command of east coast advertising for Warner Brothers which also gave me access to screenings and concerts etc forget about all the various parties and special events. The problem they had with me is that I was on the inside in a way they know they could never be which is why they always hated on me you see- why else do you think I go out of my way to throw a verbal middle finger up like its just another day on the freeway? We're talking sub-average at best and NONE of them could skate to save their lives- what more can I say in protest?
Having said all that, I get that I'm not super ultra well read on the classics along with not being so desperate for attention like unbearably VILE AND DEGENERATE MONEY GRUBBING CUNTS. You know like the vast majority of media type people out there, unless of course you've worked with literally thousands of them over the DECADES like I did, hellooooo. Thats why I write from a point of being more concerned with getting through to people as easily and understandably as possible. Like the church being persuaded to change from latin to english aka the common tounge. I'm trying to speak as clearly and concisely as I can aside from the odd ghetto/slav slang sprinkled in there with a little north jersey attitude to break things up which is basically a fuck you sorry I'm not trying to V for Vendetta you into verboseness. I'm trying to get through to the average man and youth, not a bunch of candy ass cock sucking soul selling candy hoarding rich daddies boy yes 'men' that jerk each other off at award shows, curate their social status from under their bosses desk and pretend that nobody knows, not even in jest..
That is the crux of it isn't it? The whole competitiveness and exclusionary gatekeeping tendencies are supposed to do what- make me not put an even harsher set of eyes on you? That would be nice wouldn't it? Alas I, for a lack of better phrase and all respect due, am not a nizza to be fucked with. Because if people would've been more open and supportive about it all, the custom frame building cycling industry might not have taken a colossal shit and we wouldn't be surrounded by teens on those retarded looking wheelie bikes. Granted I give credence to their authenticity over being lambasted by YUPPIE SCUM screeching about luxury concerns and 'commuting' from billyburg to their soho offices shut the fuck up try the GWB in a headwind or when you need to rescue a suicidal jumper during a windy thundershower..
Almost all of you custom frame building fuck sticks had fathers or other family members that were mechanics and or engineers. Mine was a chef that started out as a sheep herder getting bombed and shot at by nazis carrying information for Partisans aka the people in town that owned guns. But hey its def me who's the nazi for simply being Croatian as opposed to THE ONES WHO SPAWNED THEM IN THE FIRST PLACE because history doesn't repeat itself for no reason, its because the devil can't create. So I suck at math but I'm a decent cook and could delete most people in nature. Sorry if the narratives that a bunch cowards and no talent punk bitches that gossip like little girls they've never not been didn't hold up to an ounce of scrutiny. How about y'all just shut your cunt mouths and let DaddyWMD take the reigns?! Lord knows you morons tanking your own fucking industry was bad enough instead of oh I don't know PRACTICING WHAT YOU PREACH INSTEAD OF FEIGNING AN UNEARNED MORAL HIGH GROUND. Who made you retards the moral arbiter of the high ground THAT LITERALLY NEVER EXISTED?! DUUUUH ME WELD TOOBS TOGETHER- ME KNOW BEST AND CAN SHUT OUT ALL THE REST DUUUUUHHH. Imagine having the audacity to think that running your cunt mouth would never come back on you or better still, prove who the real perpetrators are to the very last person you'd want coming after you once law and order inevitably breaks down and he shows up in Judge Dredd cosplay literally laughing his fucking ass off:
But why concern yourself over any of that when you can look to your average no talent hypebeast paying AI (an indian) to promote the same exact lovingly built by robots frame for the 100th time just painted differently- oh but hey look a super rare custom made neon splatter chainring in a size way too big to ride on the streets comfortably!! Because that whole gay trend isn't identical to a bunch of broads cucking themselves as wage slaves for designer purses..
Don't even get me started on those PREPOSTEROUSLY wide double ended dildo bars what in the everlasting fuck is that nonsense all about- leverage?!, please..
What a whole lot of you fucking jerks don't seem to understand is that my 'bicycle expressionism' or whatever gay twatz box you need to stuff me into to make sense in your feeble fucking brain is that I enjoy making bicycles and would prefer to avoid making weapons to ARM WHOEVER I LIKE and yes, I would absolutely consider trading janky home made weapons for vintage NOS bicycle parts however society has to fall apart first. I'm talking about when all rule of law crumbles and its way passed go time. I'm too old to be starting shit NOT TO MENTION BEING FROM A LAND OF PEOPLE KNOWN FOR STARTING SHIT. Thankfully my FBI handler knows me better at this point, lol I mean lets be honest, that shit is too easy- where's the challenge?? You know what they say, people who can delay gratification tend to have higher IQs..
Oh and hey- I'M NOT FUCKING STUPID while SIMULTANEOUSLY staying fresh and adding skills to my repertoire whenever I can should that day darken my life once again. But, but, you said!- Relax, there's dudes out there filming themselves successfully testing 3D printed shoulder fired rocket launchers and multi payload deployment systems mounted to Temu drones. The reason you're not seeing any of that stuff is because those dudes don't let cream puffs follow them, lol. All I'm doing is postulating my version of 'reality' aka just POINTING OUT simple FACTS out loud on a nerdy old cycling blog. So by all means, leave me the fuck alone if you don't like it BUT AS THE WARM WELCOMING DALMATIAN ISLANDER from jersey I AM, HONESTLY PREFERS TO BE A GOOD HOST, PEACEFUL AND A BIT SNIDE OH NO WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO WITH THIS KID GOD FORBID YOU EVER FIND YOURSELVES WITNESSING YOUR BLOODLINES DEMISE FROM THE OTHER SIDE OF YOUR ANCESTORS EYES..
So by all means, I’d LOVE to hear what the vast majority of you had on your minds at 16. Don’t believe me..? Well lets just see what some of my High school teachers had to say during the spring of 1992:
Funny where my attention was huh? "Disinterested", "Frequently gets lost in his own thoughts", "Heavy metal doesn't help that skill". Imagine that! Funnier still is coming across these documents long after creating the first three episodes and essentially confirming everything I wrote and visually portrayed in relation to what I was going through at the time π
Here's a nice little pop culture compilation from 92' to help jog your memories and or make some new ones for those of you less ancient:
In any case, I consider all of this relatively mindless entertainment attempting to artfully articulate first world problems as a semi-informative little distraction from the 'woes' of these times and listen, I'm not your financial advisor but you should consider buying some XCN, lol after all, I just as easily could've gone to the hardware store with something less fun and utilitarian in mind ✌π
HENCE MY GIFT TO THE CYCLING GODS!!!
Made for the road..
Inspired by the sea..
..an ever faithful companion standing watch with me over my ancestors olive trees:
If I had a super power it would be my ability to pull hieroglyphics off a wall and ride them down the street:
I'm really looking forward to all the haters head gaskets being blown over this one..
Not gonna bother with the usual parts list since most of it is just random Chinese garbage from Amazon Germany..
Here's the good news:
What if I told you I was working on the real antidote this whole time..
My office view:
Just another late night symphony put on by some locals:
(turn the sound way up)
Its fun to blow weed smoke out of that window and just trip out 'alone' in the dark to the sounds of the evening..
Its an INSANE amount of hard work and INSANELY REWARDING! Every year we take 'home' 20 liters for our own personal use and is only given away freely to family and close friends as cherished gifts made with love from our ancestors land..
I'm calling it WMD's Special Reserve:
So yeah, I'm literally the chad in the bottom frame, lol wtf:
..and if you were unaware:
Also:
So yeah, just an average day at Casa SikiriΔ:
Show me one cockamamied 'influencer' that's doing anything anywhere near as cool as building ULTRA TRICK mini tall frames, acts like a complete dickhead on tha webz AND makes fresh olive oil from hundreds of years old trees at the same time- I DOUBT IT!!
As if all that wasn't good enough:
Luckily for the ladies out there I'm running a TWO FOR ONE special massage session: First I rub down one titty, then I rub down the other and vigorously repeat said motions using a time honored technique where I apply said self made olive oil to my face and go:
BRBRBRBRBRBRBRBRBR!!!
The blessing of this oil will only be received by those that weren't put on this planet solely to deceive and especially for those of you with a nice set of slightly saggy titties!
Its like I'm selling you on snake oil but also like not..
Meanwhile any completely useless MORONIC agent of the state can somehow instigate and do way worse with impunity but something about telling dumb jokes and creating art makes me the bad guy give me a fucking break. Granted if I was ever given power I would rule with an iron fist and destroy anyone that opposed my desire to carry out the will of the people and let me tell you there are dudes WAY CRAZIER than me out there that have been looking for blood for a while now. I mean, what came out about how Blackrock goes about defrauding the American people OUT OF OWNING THEIR OWN HOMES is unconscionable but my simply suggesting we remove the SCUM from the safety of their concrete and glass chasms and toss them in the hole under the prison they've earned as TRAITORS makes me the bad guy DUUUUHHH OKAY..
Yeah how about we talk about the literal traitors to humanity that are allergic to olive trees and have destroyed close to a million of them via violent expansionism but somehow I'm the bad guy for commiserating?? Don't get me wrong, the other lunatics aren't necessarily our friends either so lets not get it twisted but NO ONE GETS TO DICTATE HOW I FEEL ABOUT IT CONSIDERING WHERE I'M FUCKING FROM AND FUUUUUUCK YYYYYOOOUUUU IF YER BITCH ASS TAKES ISSUE WITH THAT WAT THA FAK FR THO???
Lets even forget who's doing what to who for a second and just focus on the fact that store bought oil is shit so destroying trees irregardless, esp those of old age, is in my mind a straight up atrocity. I'm beyond tired of pointless excuses, enough with the stupidity before the populace draws down on you. Kind of like the genz population of Nepal did to their now toothless government chairs..
Meanwhile I've literally been BEGGING for a peaceful solution and sadly, I don't have the privilege of living in delusion..
..so in an odd way I called it:
..but somehow ended up going from rad, to radicalized:
Which just so happens to be the title of my next hotly anticipated 'film' thats close to 3. HOURS. LONG.
Episode 4: From Rad to Radicalized
Which has two shit tons of 'trailers' since I was filming it through the dark ages of covid and things got out of hand, retardedly huge and grandiose, not unlike myself, and it's been the monkey on the back of the monkey on my back for years now but has been like 95% complete for the last couple but it's just so brutal and difficult for me to watch that its just taking forever to button it up but I'm thinking I'll have her done in the next few months. In the meantime, here's my top picks from Episode 4:
The first few films were a story about coming of age where as with Episode 4 its basically just my mid life crisis going absolutely out of pocket insane racking up bonus awesome points left and right but also gut wrenching in the most brutal way imaginable..
In fact, the whole thing is so brutal that along the way, like a whisper on the wind the setting sun's rays casting shadows through the olive trees I came to the conclusion that he is the way, the truth and the light..
So in closing, I'm BEGGING the cycling industry to stop boring my tits off what in the everlasting fucking fuck already- COME ON!! I'm at the point where I've been looking into electric shit just for entertainments sake- how ghey is that??
Lastly, let's not forget MY SPIZEY HOT TAKE:
Remember kids, whoever the 'they' is in whatever the circumstance may be, they're not the spymasters of old and their days are numbered which is actually what they want, lol so stupid just ignore them- its their kryptonite. Just look at what's going on Nepal, lmfao be sure to show that shit to your 'Jan 6th was worse than 9/11' friends and various other historically ignorant buffoons and NEVER FORGET THAT POLITICIANS USE THEIR MEDIA LAPDOGS TO SPREAD DIVISION AMONGST THE PEOPLE TO COVER FOR THEIR ECONOMIC PLUNDER..
..and yes we still have two grails to go! More soon. As in, when I get around to it you nasty and completely unworthy cock sucking fucking sonza bitches..
THE TRINITY GRAIL FIND SERIES 2025!! Chapter 2: My Gift to the Cycling Gods- THE FOURTH HORSEMAN
