Sunday, August 31, 2008

For those of you who haven't already seen this short:

Enjoy!


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Friday, August 29, 2008

Suuuuuper sexy Colnago Commuter Touring machine!



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Thursday, August 28, 2008

BIKE FAIL!


Actual photograph by Erik K.

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BEYOND Stunning De Rosa!

This really is something special:


drrooooooooool...

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mmmmmmm Gan Well carbon...

Now if only there was a way the seller could stipulate that the winner bidder NOT be allowed to put riser bars on this stunner...


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To Deep V, or not to Deep V.. That is the question...


It all started for me about 5 years ago with the purchase of a new set of Velocity Spartacus road wheels. As you can see, they're built with a set of Deep V's. It was the first time I'd ever heard, seen or ridden a pair of Velocity Deep V's. Back when they only really came in silver or black. They were the first Velocity product I'd ever used. Overall the wheels were great! I loved the sound they made when cutting through the wind and they were nice, strong and fast. Only going out of true, slightly mind you, was when some mother fucker turned right into me nearly head on while I was crossing and intersection (ahaha! I just remembered that I blogged that accident on my old myspace blog in 04'!). A couple years after, I ended up passing them on to a friend who still rides them to this day. When I was getting parts together for another build, I got a set Deep V's without even thinking about it. Along with the next set of wheels I had built. Before you knew it, EVERYONE seemed to have them in every crazy color imaginable. Which made sense to me. Combine with a 32 hole high flange hub they're fucking INDESTRUCTIBLE. Which obviously keeps wheel maintenance at a minimum. Is it slightly annoying and trendy for everyone to be riding them? Maybe. But this is what generally happens to well built dependable products. You know, like Levis. Now I'm not saying there aren't a fuckload of other really great rims out there. They're DEF are. In my case, I'm just brand loyal. When I find something I like, I stick with it and make it a point to recommend them to everyone I know. I would assume that anyone who spends a lot of time riding on gnarly city streets would feel the same way about their preferred rim of choice. Having said that, is it annoying that people are buying them purely for their looks? Maybe. But here's the thing, what they're buying is a great reliable product that will more than likely stand the test of time. They're not buying into the type of lame fad that just gets tossed aside when the next new hot thing that comes along to replace it. They'll always have a use and value (unless Prolly gets his filthy mitts on them). So now that they're trendy what are people supposed to do? Stop riding them, or not even buy them just because everyone else has them? Please... What kind of a waste would that be? Don't ride them if you're not into em, but drop the hate. In this case, it's totally undeserved...

In my opinion this is a rare instance where the trend is actually a good thing and shouldn't be hated on. And to be perfectly honest, the bottom line is this: If the only reason you have to hate on Deep V's is because you're sick of seeing them around everywhere and that they're trendy etc.. Guess what? you're actually just part of another trend.. Go figure! Sorry, but if you can't beat em', join em'...

Update: While Deep V's are indeed Indistructable as stated from my expeirince with them for the most part, if they get run over by a car, much like anything that finds it's way under TWO TONS of pressure, they're going to get BENT really badly. This is called the E-X-C-E-P-T-I-O-N...

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Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Downhill TANDEM???

While most of you know I'm not particularly into MTBing, I have to say that this Santana Downhill Tandem is pretty redicc!



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NOW TAKING BETS!!!!!! THIS IS YOUR LAST CHANCE!!!

What we have here ladies and gentleman is an ultra rare and hightly sought after 04' Bianchi Pista Concept frame in MINT NEVER BEFORE RIDDEN CONDITION!!!


Wow, a frame of this vintage has got to be worth at least three times as much as your average 08' Concept frame despite being virtually identical. Not to mention that 04' was a very, very good year. It was the last year before anyone knew what a track bike actually was in case you were wondering. I'll be bringing you up to the minute reports as the next 6+ nail biting days go on!

Place your bets on what you think is going to be the high bid in this post's comments section. Whoever guesses closest to the final bid wins a prize!

Current bid as of 8/20 11:06 pm EST with 6 days and 18 hours to go:

$430.00

Current bid as of 8/21 10:00 am EST with 6 days and 7 hours to go:

$450.00

WOW, things sure are getting exciting now!:

Current bid as of 8/21 6:19 pm EST with 5 days and 23 hours to go:

$660.00

Current bid as of 8/22 12:39 pm EST with 5 days and 5 hours to go:

$690.00

Whoa, now this is unheard of: A Pista Concept going down in price??? It had gone up to $700 but I was holding out for a higher bid before updating it again when I saw it actually lowered!

Current bid as of 8/25 9:25 pm EST with 1 days and 20 hours to go:

$660.00

Okay, so after the other day's upset we're back to going up again:

Current bid as of 8/27 3:28 pm EST with 3 hours and 45 min to go:

$710

Whoooa it's getting exciting now!!!

Current bid as of 8/27 4:07 pm EST with 1 hours and 52 min to go:

$848.38

Oh man, what an exciting auction this was. So many ups and downs!

Closing bid: $848.38

Big surprise seeing as how it's clearly worth WAY more than a measly $300 over retail price. What a deal the happy new owner got!

Our closest bet was for $875 by Jason! Be sure to contact me within the next few minutes for your prize man! otherwise you don't get shit!!



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Monday, August 25, 2008

$8.01 Turbo saddle???????

Well, to be perfectly honest it was actually $14.51 with shipping, hehehehe- SUCKERS!!!



It's wrinkled a bunch from use but I don't really give a shit since I'm going to be doing the same shortly. Every Turbo I have is a little different. So funny! This ones got a sort of octogonal angle thing going on in the rear that I've never seen before. It's also in a rare dark grey I've also never seen before. It's suuuuper squishy and soft too. I can't wait to get my fat ass on this saddle to check it out!

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Coincidences, Cunts and Cunundrums...

Saturday a pretty fun and semi weird day. Here in the city we had the whole Saturday street closures thing going on. It was the last one so I felt semi obligated to scope it out. While I was waiting for Andy to show up on the 72nd street end, I noticed that Commissioner Ray Kelly was on hand to show his miserable face. Unfortunately I was only able to snag a bike snob esk blurry photo of him and his giddy wife on a yellow schwinn:


Had there not been cops all around me I probably would've gotten a better shot of him instead of just making another porno shot of my bike...

He eventually made his way over to the group of 5-0 standing next to me. They chatted a little. Blue wall stuff mostly. What was really amusing was when these two twatty old broads came up to him and were actually complaining though their shit eating grins about the whole 'bike people problem' here in our fair city. You know, the way the majority of everyone who doesn't ride a bike see it. I tried to listen in a little in while looking completely uninterested but being the ever hyper aware copper that he is, Kelly resorted to whispering to the old cunts so as not to alarm me. Fucking douche...

We eventually rode downtown and enjoyed not being challenged by cars. Though I would have to compare it to riding on say the Henry Hudson Green way below 57th street on a Saturday. Slightly more spread out but still kind of annoying...

Once we got downtown and headed over the Williamsburg bridge and got some bagels. Which is where I spotted this beast:


As we sat on the curb across the street the best/worst/best thing ever happened. This woman who I had seen pass by earlier with a laundry bag and some other stuff was riding back after dropping it off at the laundromat. She was one of those six something foot tall thick but not fat amazonian chicks. MASSIVE girl. Also massive in size were the two mellons strapped to her chest. I only mention this because (aside from being suicidally horny) she was wearing this summer dress that could barely contain them while upright. As she rode over she tried to hop up the curb at an angle which was a really bad idea. Most of us have learned the hard way that if you don't pick it up a bit, the rear wheel ain't going to do anything but drag across that curb as if on a rail. I have to say as a man, there's nothing worse than watching a girly girl take a spill. No wait, what's worse is when you're walking down the street and a super hot chick walks by right as you catch a whiff of dog shit. Bleech!

So the worst/best part of it was my desire to want to put my bagel down, be a gentleman and go give her a hand. Right before I was able to do so, she started getting up. Which is when those fucking mellons I'd mentioned earlier, now horizontal and subject to more of the earth's gravitational pull, reminded me of an super skinny woman who's 8 1/2 months pregnant with twins: Mom, we're sick of rubbing up against your boney ass pelvis, LET US THE FUCK OUT! The sight of which left me motionless with the exception of my right arm instinctively stuffing another bite of bagel into my mouth. I did manage to blurt out an "Are you okay?" between chewing. Aside from staring that's about all I could physically muster. She said she was fine while dusting herself off. Which is when I noticed the scrape on her knee and trickle of blood flowing down her shin. I felt really guilty and awful for not helping her out. Though at the same time I kinda wanted to latch onto that big thick leg of hers like a leech and sup the blood from her wounds...

Christ I can't believe I spent all that time talking about some woman's tits! WTF is WRONG with me??? Meh, whatever.. They were fuckin' great!!

Once the gawking was over we rode back to the city to a shop that had somehow slipped under my til now radar called Chari and Co. A Japanese run mostly NJS/Keirin bike shop on the LES. GNARLY selection of Keirin frames and parts. Along with the gnarly prices you expect of Keirin frames to match. While there it turned out there was a bike show happening all of three blocks away. Which was weird cause I had no clue there was going to be one today. Usually bike events like this are better publicized. Anyways, I headed over to check it out and what do ya know, they were even dishing out prizes:


There were a bunch of cool bikes too:


There was a bunch more but since I was caught off guard by this show I wasn't exactly in a I have to take lots of pictures for my blog mode.. yyyeah, that only sounded slightly lame...

I also had the pleasure of meeting a bunch of the fellas off the NYC fixed gear forum too which was cool. As in my case, most of the people I talked to there had no idea it was going on. Someone put it best when they said: "It's kinda like bike fetish day, only toned down a lot"
I figured, shit, I'm here and I have a pretty bike.. Might as well enter. As I was signing up I was told that they were also taking photos of people and their bikes for a book that they were producing. I went ahead and got in line not really thinking much of it. I'm sure I'll regret not learning that lesson after what happened the last time someone asked me if they could take my photo...

A short time later they announced the results of the contest. Brooklyn Machine Works won a prize for their crazy ass suuuuuuper long BMX bike which for some reason I didn't get a shot of. This HUMONGOUS dude who went by the name of 'Fridge' won a couple prizes for his wwwwwicked trike complete with a custom fiberglass subwoofer enclosure. LOUD!!! Yeah, another bike I didn't get a shot of despite being completely redonk. Shortly after my name was called having won 'The Best Red Bike Award'.. I mean what are the chances that I happen to be riding around on an annoyingly all red bike, in the neighborhood of a bike show, that was giving out a prize for the best red bike..? Fucking weird man...

It's probably one of my favorite prizes I've won just cause it spins:


Yep.. Doesn't take much to amuse me folks...

After the show I went out to Bed Stuy to deliver one of the frames from my recent acquisition to Mattio (another fella from the forums). He was super stoked it on and should be sending me some pics of it built up soon...

Then I gave my former co-worker and female version of myself Kristen a ring to meet up for din-dins. I only say that about her because it's true and cause she likes girls probably as much as I do. She's also right up there with being way into bitchin' bikes too. I built her this wwwwwicked Pink, White and Black Bob Jackson road bike a few years ago. While I don't have a photograph of the bike, a former co-worker of ours baked a cake for her birthday a while back with a very reasonable facsimile of it on top:


Awesome right??!!!

I was famished from riding and was in the mood for something that had at one point been breathing. Kristen recommended this place called: Fette Sau (Fat Pig in German). It was gnarly! Great fucking meat sold by the pound and served up on aluminum oven trays. With what appeared to be a good selection of beer and whiskey. I don't drink so I can't give you any more info than that unfortunately...

Fattened by spicy pork sausage, biscuits and pickles, we then made an effort to walk it off. As we walked amongst the bevy of bodacious babes of Bedford and mentally bashed that fucking tie dye clad dancing hoho on the corner of north 6th in the head, we came to the conclusion that it was high time I build her another bike. Something in a more upright 3 speed cruiser with mustache bars or something. More on that in the near future...

What ended my night was a sight that I know for a fact the bike snob would've eaten up. I WISH I could've gotten a photo or video of it!!! As I approached the entrance to the Williamsburg bridge I was lucky enough to witness this bearded dude riding a fixed gear the wrong way up the street kinda fast. Nothing special on it's own but what was incredible about it is the fact that he had a backpack on AND was carrying an upright vacuum cleaner WITH BOTH FUCKING HANDS!!! I swear to you it was unreal. No handed riding at it's best and most unbelievably refuckingtarded! I knew then that I could officially call it a night...

I was on the way home when I noticed that the Hoboken skate park was empty. I decided to take the opportunity to bust out with some Berts since no one was around to make fun of me:



All in all it was a fun day. Fun until I got home and realized how badly sunburnt my pasty ass was:


OUCHY!

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Friday, August 22, 2008

Worst Bicycle Theif EVAR????!!!!!

Wow this dude is fuuuucked up!

"What exactly was he planning to do with 2,865 bicycles?"

I'd be all sorts of tempted to rifle through all the shit he'd hoarded but probably wouldn't for fear of any bad bicycle karma rubbing off on me...

UPDATE FROM A LOCAL:

Dude, this guy was a sight to behold! I live about 100 ft from his store. He'd be out on the sidewalk every single day and night doing repairs rain or shine; he worked like a DOG. You've got to hand it to him, he's fucking passionate about bicycles.
One day I decided to go in. I HAD to see. The place was amazing... all dark and dank like a cave – but a cave packed to the rafters with bikes. All the bikes I saw were shitty junkers so I told him I wanted something "nice". He looked me right in the eye for a second as if to say, "if you're a fucking cop, I'll kill you." He's a big, scary guy with a scary Slovenian accent. Satisfied that I didn't look like a cop (I'm a skinny cyclist) he led me downstairs.
Maaaaan... there was some good stuff in there, but I vowed I wouldn't buy anything because, well, you know, it's all hot. But I saw a sweeeeeeet Colnago hanging high on a wall. My size too. It was a thing of beauty. I couldn't help myself, I was shaking. I asked him how much. $600.
Shiiiiit... I... I... had to have it...
"But I can't sell it to you." I asked him why. He was killing me. "It's too nice."
Whaa? I think what he was saying is that it was too distinctive-looking and probably too freshly stolen. I pleaded, but no. I couldn't have it.

I few years on I still dream about that bike, but I'm actually glad I didn't buy it, though. Toronto has enough of a bike theft problem with out me perpetuating it.

Thanks Wilson!

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Thursday, August 21, 2008

LOVELY Merckx!


Prolly's probably drooling all over this one, hehe...



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Nashbar has me by the balls again!

Today is the last day for their sale:



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Semi OT: Doubley good samaritan day!

So I'm on my way to work just now walking down 40th between 5th and 6th when I stumble upon a digital camera just sitting on the sidewalk. What you have to understand about NYC and most other large cities I'm sure, is if you find a piece of electronics on the ground, it's mostly just fallen from the tree so to speak. My initial reaction was: oh nice! as I picked it up and had a quick look around for the owner. The thing about finding something semi nice here in the street is that you've got three choices (if there's no identifying info on the item): 1) Keep it and be stoked 2) Give it to a doorman nearby or something 3) If you have time, wait around for the person to show up...

There are of course issues which each of those choices: 1) Guilt and or Karma 2) Most likely the person will just keep it for their own damn selves and 3) Who the fuck has enough time for themselves let alone to wait around for the dumbass who dropped their shit?

My approach to this conundrum is to merge choices 1 and 3 together to form choice 4:

4) Give the person about 15-20 min to realize their error and run back to the scene. If they don't show, take the item and pass it along to a friend who is without that particular electronic. Like I did with the 1st gen ipod nano I found on that bench with a pack menthols a while back...

As I sat there waiting I decided to have a look and see what photographs were taken by the owner. It was pretty funny looking through because it was obviously a girl and a friend visiting from some country in Eastern Europe (I can tell cause my family is right off the boat). They had started their day at the Museum of Natural History. Then made their way down through Central Park and Times square. Right up to the point where your humble narrator stumbled upon their camera. Oh BTW.. The chick in the photos was tall, blonde, wearing a tank top and most importantly: HOTT.. So you know my sorry ass was gonna wait around and fantasize about some hott chick about to come running back for her camera only to find my dumbass waiting there for her. Low and behold not a few minutes later do I see said hott chick rushing against the crowd of people to see if her camera was still there. It was.. Magical.. Why in gods name I didn't take any photo/video for evidence I do not know.. But that's okay though, it was our moment. As she approached I held her camera out and said "Aha, I've been waiting for you!" To which she smiled wide while on the verge of tears: "My god thank you! You are my angel!!" in that type of thick european accent that makes you want to pre-jizz yourself. As we both walked along heading off in the same direction I described how I valiantly waited and perused her photos looking for a picture to help me identify her. To which she kept repeating the whole 'you're my angel' thing.. Yeah.. I ate it up...

Anyways, she ran off to meet up her friend (not so hott). Of course as she did was when I finally thought to myself: 'You asshole! Why the fuck didn't you take a photo for your blog?!' Yes, as pathetic as it sounds, that thought does cross my mind more often than not. I then sped up my pace thinking I might still have a chance to take one of her real quick. I caught up to her and the not so hot friend at the intersection of 5th and 40th. Right as I was about to make my move I hear that unmistakable sound of a pedal screeching across the pavement. I immediately turned to my left and saw some kid on a fixer sliding across the ground towards me. Right as that happened traffic from 40th street began lurching forward. I then jumped in between him and the traffic holding up my hand and screaming STOP! Because as we all know he would've had a better chance of not being run over had he been a bright orange street cone the way the fucking drivers are here. Once the cars stopped I turned around and the kid was getting up. I asked him if he was okay and he said 'yes'. I gave him a pat on the back and told him to take it easy...

Realizing my moment with the hott chick had now long passed, I decided to just get back in line with the rest of the sheep and shuffle along to work. Though I did so feeling a slight sense of accomplishment for the day. Which was nice up until the moment I set foot in my office all of two minutes later... uuuuuUUUUUG!

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Wednesday, August 20, 2008

Easy there now buddy, eeeeeeasy!

If I had a dual disc wheel set up like this:


I'd probably do something even more obnoxious than to just toss some flame decals on it...



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Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Creamsicle Tange!


I still prefer the Creamsicle Nagasawa from little ways back...

No comment on this next photo:


However on this photo:


I'm gonna have to go with: Mucho fucking Retardo!


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OOoooohhhhHHH!!!

"This bike is like if the hottest chick in the entire world died in her prom dress and a week later came back as zombie, she would be kind of nasty looking, but you would still sort of want to do sexy stuff cause she might look alright, but then again she might also end up killing you..."


I couldn't have put it better myself- Thanks Chris!

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My gods what is the fraking world coming to?

I wanna know who was the douche in charge of set design on this E-Trade commercial. If they were truly hip, they would've had a fancy pants Pista Concept in the background instead of the Chrome one...



I don't care how hard they try to sell: you can trade stocks and still be a cool 30 something hipster... You're still trading stocks... BTW, does anyone remember the original 'online' type commercial that's spoofed here by Bill?

Also, would someone please tell the Sci Fi channel to resume the 4th season of BSG before I break down and watch all the previous seasons AGAIN...

FUCK.. too late...

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Sunday, August 17, 2008

When too much is NOT a good thing...

Okay, I think I'm going to need a bike part intervention or something because now I've officially crossed the line. The line after the one I crossed already... ug...

As you can see, this time I walked away with lot of components. Hopefully I'll get some wheels this coming weekend...

Rather than going through all that shit, I decided it would be in my best interest to go skateboarding instead:



I know, not only am I lame but I'm also that guy who makes weird noises on squirmy landings. I was much better like 10 years ago when I wasn't old. Anyways, I thought it would be amusing to make a self filmed video like I used to when I was like 14...

Sunday:

Okay, so earlier today I went through the stuff:


YUM!

More here...

I started seting up the C4 Joker temporarily to see if I would like it or not but the fucking BB is proving to be a miserable cunt to remove. More on that once I get the fucker out...

I think I'm going to list a few things on ebay tomorrow but the rest I'm going to try to get rid of locally...

Also, more people should really try selling their pista's with 70's style porn shots of their ladies straddling the TT...



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Thursday, August 14, 2008

This Hetchins Tandem has officially DESTROYED ME!!!

Complete and utter devastation over here after viewing this spectacle of spectacles...


As seen on the Hetchins website...


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A couple of whips I forgot to list in yesterday's ebay finds post



Rediculous René Herse!


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Definitely a DON'T:


I really wanted to slap the shit out of this guy!


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Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Out of the 5000+ ebay listings I looked through last night...

...these are some of the ones that caught my eye:

Philly Paramount fixer:


Reeeeeedonkulous Schwinn Paramount 50th goldie WITH GOLD GROUP!!!


This dude's listed this sweet Pegoretti like 10 times to no avail:




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