Friday, March 13, 2009

I think I'm going to have to call bullshit..

..on this Jack Spade sub-store for their misleading use of the phrase: Jack and Jimbo's Bicycle Shop

I was just passing by when I saw the eye catching orange graphics on their windows and thought- Oh now I HAVE to get a load of this shit!


Now when I see a sign that says bicycle shop I'm led to believe that behind it is, well.. a bike shop.. In this instance however, it was very far from it. But there's a first for everything! Unfortunately it was closed but I did manage to peep in a bit to see what the deal was:


To their credit they did have this wicked, wicked nice Custom SS Indy Fab Ti Townie:


So out of curiosity I called them just now.. On the other end of the phone was the sound of a woman's cute voice which of course threw me off for a second but I managed to find out what I needed. First of all, the Indy Fab is $5k.. and it's totally sick. While I won't get into the whole spending more than a couple of G's on a townie style bike thing, someone def does needs to go over there to toss a brick through the window and liberate that shit like STAT..

Now, here's the real clincher.. The Schwinn/Ross/Whatever cruisers or 'vintage bicycles' as they like to refer to them as, range from $250 to $500.. No, I'm not shitting you.. $250 to $500 for a bike you can find at any freaking garage sale for literally.. $10-20 bucks.. They claim that they're in good shape and have a 14 day warranty but that doesn't make up for the fact they're charging in rape dollars for em'..

Anyways, according to the cute voice, she said it's their concept store they're doing right now. They do have a guy who comes by to do repairs but from what I could tell they don't offer tubes, locks or any other parts that a REAL bike shop would sell..

So between the contrast of bikes, beyond retarded prices and the fact that it's just not a real bike shop.. I officially call bullshit on Jack and Jimbo's Bicycle Shop..

BTW, the only other mention of it I saw around the interwebs is this one at shophound.. In the article they mention that before they brought the 'bike shop' in there it was called Jack Spade's Fruitcake shop....... need I say more?

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6 comments:

Justin August said...

Between the misogyny and the homophobia I don't know where to start!

You might have had a good point but, not shockingly for you, ruined your point with your overly-broish mentality and language.

Anonymous said...

Well at least its a bike shop where you don't have a sales man trying to sell things I don't need to me as soon as i walk in the door.

Maybe you could help then adjust their concept so its slightly more useful

Anonymous said...

Im pretty sure Jimbo is the (semi retired) bike mechanic that works Fridays and Saturdays. Also, the shop carries bikes from Signature Cycles and Landmark Vintage Bike Shop as well as carries Rapha gear. It may not be a "real bike shop" but it is a "real Jack Spade shop".

Anonymous said...

Hey,
Awesome updates on the site,
I was there on saturday and you pretty much summed it up, while the women there are cuter then kittens, I have a feeling that they pretty much dont want grubby bike guys in and out of there... those vintage bikes are for ironic girls in dresses to come and take away, although they have been serviced nicely, def not worth more then 90 bucks...
They have some rapha pieces there that will sit there since they are at full retail, and that indy fab is amazing, but 5k.
The tune-up is reasonable at like 40 bucks or something, but the guy wasnt there and has some crazy schedule like 2-5 m-f... im not sure who exactly this is for except said ironic midwestern trying to get a vintage bike girl.
Peace
Rob

Alan Sikirić said...

Anonymous - 1) IT'S NOT A BIKE SHOP!! and 2) I would adjust their concept by either taking down the bicycle shop sign or by having them make it a REAL BIKE SHOP!

John - Yeah, see, that's all fine and well but they really shouldn't advertise it as a bike shop. It's more of a clothing/acc. boutique that just happens to sells bikes as well..

Spiktakula - THANK YOU for confirming my suspicions and making some great points as well!

and saving my favorite comment for last..

Justin - I though long and hard about how to respond to your comment. I even juggled the idea around doing a separate post about it. But then I realized you know what.. 1) it's not really worth the effort and 2) I know who I am, and who I'm not..

What I'm not is the type of person who's so blinded by some self concocted, romantically sensitive version of himself. I AM A MAN AND I HAVE MY FAULTS.. A man who in fact, freaking loves women. and.. Just to be sparking fucking clear.. Not only is not homophobic, but actually has gay friends.. and as for my faults.. Well, I'm a bit of a fucking asshole at times but who isn't honestly?

As for your comments.. Just because I talk about women in disgusting detail at times, doesn't make me a misongynist. And you know what Justin, out of the two years I've been running this blog.. NOT ONE TIME has anyone accused me of being misongynistic.. NOT EVEN THE WOMEN I KNOW FOR A FACT LOOK AT THIS BLOG.. Fuck man, some of the biggest misongynists I know are women! AND THEY'RE LESBIANS!!! As for the homophobia comment, I have no idea how you could even derive that assumption from anything I've said other than the fact that YOU were the one thinking of it. YOU were the one that not only WANTED to hear those things, but was HOPING to hear it just so YOU could write something in defense and feel some sense of pride in yourself. WHICH IS SO FUCKING PATHETIC I CAN BARELY STAND IT..

So here's what it comes down to Justin.. YOU ARE OFFICIALLY THE BIGGEST FUCKING PANSY EVER!! The fact that you call me out on my 'language' PROVES it!.

As far as I can tell you have one of two choices:

1) Stop looking at the internet, stop watching tv, stop going out in public because god-for-fucking-bid you see or hear something that offends your delicate and overly PC nature. Oh and don't forget the Maxi pads for when it's that time of the month. It's bad enough you've gotten them all up in a twist!

2) Grow back your fuckin' balls, stop taking self portraits with your pet fucking cat
and get some real pussy you over sensitive frilly fucking man dyke!

michael slater said...

HAhaAHaHaHahaH I love that picture of PlayerHater and Mister Boots his kittywitty. Fucking hilarious.

Pwned